MR. MAN, YOU ARE THE HEAD OF YOUR FAMILY By Awotiku Akinlayo David

MR. MAN, YOU ARE THE HEAD OF YOUR FAMILY

By Awotiku Akinlayo David

“Daddy, what is the problem?” I exclaimed in confusion. “Hmmm…Akin, just keep praying for me to have sufficient grace to be a responsible father” my Daddy replied.

Problems, faults and tough times are inevitable in virtually all marriages. (My own family is unique and we are still having the best time ever. I’m not being bias about this though). They are things that should be subjected under the control of the parents especially the father.

Times without number abuses come from either of the parents against each other (in the children’s presence sometimes). Hence it is normal for problems to show forth in any family at all but they are things that contribute to the uniqueness of the family. (Your family is also unique in its own in that it has you). I may not be married yet but I’m also playing the role of a first born of my family but anyway this article is basically and specifically for the fathers.

I can testify of the active responsibilities of my father in all facets especially spiritually, mentally and financially. During spiritual attacks especially Satan’s oppressions over the children, physical (cats, scorpions, snakes, spiders even human beings and more), my dad would fight them physically (chasing some possessed animals with sticks and stones). Then they also come spiritually, (sometimes in dreams or reality) my father would attend to it as well (through psalms and prayers) especially in the night while we are long gone into deep sleep (probably dreaming of how daddy will buy suya & fried potatoes for us), sometimes we fall asleep on the chair or mat, we would sleep safely and soundly only to wake up on the bed in our room at dawn whereas daddy had been praying throughout the night.

I remembered vividly a case of a cat tormenting us every night, the day my dad did the necessary thing, at dawn we found the cat dead, the owner threatened to kill us but my dad was able to stand boldly and defend his family to any length at all.

TO THE FATHERS

I write this to you fathers so that you may know you are the head of your family in all areas. If as a man, your responsibility is needed in the Morning Afternoon & Night (MAN) then now that you are a MR. it means More Responsibilities. No coward or immature man can be a father. As a leader in your family, Courage and Maturity are what define you or qualify you to be a father. Being a father is not just about having kids but it is all about responsibilities.

Devil is so cunning that he uses your weakness to create more weaknesses. You must resist him and give him no opportunity to exploit you and take that advantage over your family. Courageously face every fear, faults, anxieties and problems that the marriage might bring forth.

Several times mummy will offend you and vice versa, you must be spiritually matured enough as a father to address such issues so as not to give room for satanic oppression and attacks over your family. Don’t forget that your maturity determines your authority. “I’m your head, woman! So you have to give me some respect, be warned or else I'll teach you a lesson you will never forget for life”. These and more offensive statements are irrelevant in times of misunderstandings. It is immaturity to remind your family of your position as the head. It shouldn’t be if you are really taking your responsibility as your priority. You can as well defend your family against the real enemy of your marriage.

I’ve seen fathers run to their church pastors at the slightest things that could easily be address if they are matured enough especially during misunderstanding with their wife. Some run to pastors for help because of spiritual warfare, when they had bad dreams or when they seems to be defeated or oppressed or sensed deadly or negative signs or sickness or probably when the family is going through difficult times in any ramification. They’ll just assume that the responsibility of their family’s spiritual welfare is on their pastors forgetting that the pastor is also a father in his own family and has his own family issues to battle with.

I am emphatically stressing this right now, you don’t have to keep running to pastors at every slight thing either spiritually or physically. Pastors are not to run your home for you but to take good care of the church members but fathers’ major responsibility is to take care of or run his own family in all areas. Don’t put your responsibility on the pastors’ head, that’s cowardice.

God made you king and priest over your family and as well as the younger families around you. You are a spiritual giants because God has blessed you with every virtues to be a great and responsible father. Pastor’s help are very minimal in affairs of the family therefore running to pastors should reduce. You can inform your pastor about the situations but handle them yourself. Fight your family battles yourself and stop depending on pastors to fight on your behalf. Pastors are met to advice you, encourage your soul, instigate your spirit and mainly pray for you.

However, I won’t want to be misquoted, running to pastors is not wrong but should be limited. Defend your family yourself and don’t expect pastors to do it for you. Don’t expect prophets to keep consulting God on behalf of your family instead consult God yourself through prayers because you are the prophet of your home. Your frequent running to pastors shows your level of maturity in especially the spiritual things.

TO THE POTENTIAL FATHERS

I can easily tell that many of our youths are fill with high level of anxiety of getting married (while some are scared to venture into courtship talk less of marriage.) Many think marriage is all about satisfying sexual urge, they think sexual satisfaction alone is what define marriage forgetting the fact that it is a way of reproduction and that automatically made you a father. Sex is not casual neither is it limited to physical, it is spiritual and involves knowing or intimacy.

I write this to you potential fathers so that you may know that spirituality is paramount and sacrosanct in the responsibility of a father and there is need for spiritual preparation while you are yet to become a father.

It is your spiritual inclination that improves your spiritual preparation for fatherly responsibilities. Now that you are still young, single and free is the time to prepare, what are you doing now that you are yet to have any marriage responsibility?

Your responsibility now as a youth is your preparation towards your responsibility later as a father.

Don’t waste your time on irrelevant things and think you are enjoying youthful stage outside Christ. "Remember your creator in the days of your youth" the bible said.

This is the right time to invest into your future. Now is the time to go for rigorous, long and marathon fasting and prayers. Now is the set time to build yourself up in the spiritual things and strengthen your relationship with the Holy Spirit. Now is the accurate time to start preparing for marriage irrespective of your age or marital status. It is time for sexual subjection and not for sexual advancement. You’ve got to prepare to be a husband and a father and not a sex partner.

Praying 24hours a day is conducive and convenient at this single stage of life because after marriage, wife and children may affect you in any facet and that may distort your spiritual life. You are not to be managed spiritually while preparing for marriage or else it will soon be damaged. Rigorous retreats for yourself is possible and visible now. This is the best time to know and get closer to God than ever, before getting closer to marriage. Know God before a marriage problems and not during marriage problems. Get acquitted with God now that you are still a potential father.

It is high time we started recognizing and fulfilling purpose right now. Don’t rush into marriage to realize that you are yet to know your purpose talk less of starting to fulfil it. Adam had already started fulfilling purpose by taking dominion over all other creatures, cultivating the garden and the likes before God noticed that he was alone and needed a helpmeet.

Your usefulness is more noticeable during your singleness and it is not an excuse to be ignorant of fulfilling purpose. Don’t keep ruminating and nurturing anxieties of how, whom or when to get married, they depress your soul and weaken your spirit. Focus on Jesus who is the author and finisher of our faith and focus on fulfilling God’s purpose for your life.

Finally brethren, prepare well to be a wise father because you are going to impart your children and as well be a good spiritual husband because you will also impart your wife. You are a start to a new landmark in your generation which your children and some other younger generations will follow. Therefore you must grow into spiritual maturity and this will limit running to pastors all the time at every small issues.

HAPPY FATHERS’ DAY TO ALL FATHERS AND POTENTIAL FATHERS.

I call you blessed!

King_Hosanna cares

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